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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/24/2010 11:27:22 AM
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doinkdom
Posts: 5670
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The higher lowcountry
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Events and programs will draw younger folks in, but what's going to make them stick around?
If our churches become event or program driven, then how does a young person become a fully functional follower of Christ within a local body of believers? I'm not convinced that programs or events are what younger people need...I think encouraging them to serve alongside everyone else, to be introduced to gospel-centered living and learning how to apply scripture to their lives is something that would be of better benefit.
_____________________________
My Uncles: Twins with younger brother in the middle
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/25/2010 1:33:30 AM
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RJR_fan
Posts: 801
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From: RTP, in sunny NC USA
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quote:
If our churches become event or program driven, then how does a young person become a fully functional follower of Christ within a local body of believers? I'm not convinced that programs or events are what younger people need...I think encouraging them to serve alongside everyone else, to be introduced to gospel-centered living and learning how to apply scripture to their lives is something that would be of better benefit.
This stuff happens far more easily in a private home than it does in a church building. Families that make their own homes their "youth program" report that more than 90% of their bouncy offspring continue walking with God after they grow up.
See Deut. 6:4-9 for a Biblical description of what this kind of discipleship program would look like:
quote:
4 Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God is one LORD:
5 And thou shalt love the LORD thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might.
6 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart:
7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.
8 And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes.
9 And thou shalt write them upon the posts of thy house, and on thy gates.
Speaking of "youth ministry" -- when the family table becomes the preferred venue for evangelism, family prayers can actually pin real names and faces to beloved unbelievers. Children of almost any age can be actively involved in a family hospitality ministry. This can be very effective if you are reaching out to Muslim students. Many come from family-oriented cultures, but kids are rare on college campuses. Hollywood has taught the world that Americans have no time for faith or family. Being made welcome in the heart of a warm Christian family is a real eye-opener for these sharp young people.
_____________________________
Blogging my way through the Turkish New Testament
Meet my beloved mentor, RJR
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/25/2010 9:59:48 AM
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iluvatar
Posts: 3529
Joined: 4/12/2005
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The best way to attract new people of any age is to fill your church with people who want to be there, not out of some sort of legalistic duty or piety, but because they're truly happy being there. Be honest and open with people; be approachable and friendly. Don't beat them over the head with certain political viewpoints. Programs and events seem kind of gimmicky to me and I imagine they'll seem gimmicky and shallow to a lot of other people, too.
A lot of it has to do with the local population (Boston's a big college town), but my church is mostly 18-35 year olds and even though it's only 6 years old, we're busting at the seams. Aside from a singles group that meets once in a while, the "programs" we have all minister to some other group, not the main attendees of the church.
-Dan.
_____________________________
Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/25/2010 10:25:08 AM
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doinkdom
Posts: 5670
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: The higher lowcountry
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quote:
ORIGINAL: RJR_fan
This stuff happens far more easily in a private home than it does in a church building. Families that make their own homes their "youth program" report that more than 90% of their bouncy offspring continue walking with God after they grow up.
Completely agree!
_____________________________
My Uncles: Twins with younger brother in the middle
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/25/2010 10:36:24 AM
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Elena1030
Posts: 2977
Joined: 6/21/2006
From: Music City, USA
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iluvatar
The best way to attract new people of any age is to fill your church with people who want to be there, not out of some sort of legalistic duty or piety, but because they're truly happy being there. Be honest and open with people; be approachable and friendly. Don't beat them over the head with certain political viewpoints. Programs and events seem kind of gimmicky to me and I imagine they'll seem gimmicky and shallow to a lot of other people, too.
A lot of it has to do with the local population (Boston's a big college town), but my church is mostly 18-35 year olds and even though it's only 6 years old, we're busting at the seams. Aside from a singles group that meets once in a while, the "programs" we have all minister to some other group, not the main attendees of the church.
-Dan.
Do y'all have age-graded Sunday School/Bible study? Or does everyone (all ages) do Bible study together?
_____________________________
"I like to stride, not mince." -- Maggie
Prayer thread for singles who desire to marry someday
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/25/2010 12:08:59 PM
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RJR_fan
Posts: 801
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From: RTP, in sunny NC USA
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quote:
Do y'all have age-graded Sunday School/Bible study? Or does everyone (all ages) do Bible study together?
Our whole family studies God's Word together, and applies it to our real-world daily lives. From time to time, we "compare" notes with Muslim friends, and I make sure the kids know the differences between Christianity and Islam.
The kids (11 and 13) are more likely to enjoy the sermon with us on Sunday morning than they are to trot off to a segregated group.
_____________________________
Blogging my way through the Turkish New Testament
Meet my beloved mentor, RJR
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/25/2010 4:39:15 PM
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writerchick
Posts: 461
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iluvatar
The best way to attract new people of any age is to fill your church with people who want to be there, not out of some sort of legalistic duty or piety, but because they're truly happy being there. Be honest and open with people; be approachable and friendly. Don't beat them over the head with certain political viewpoints. Programs and events seem kind of gimmicky to me and I imagine they'll seem gimmicky and shallow to a lot of other people, too.
A lot of it has to do with the local population (Boston's a big college town), but my church is mostly 18-35 year olds and even though it's only 6 years old, we're busting at the seams. Aside from a singles group that meets once in a while, the "programs" we have all minister to some other group, not the main attendees of the church.
-Dan.
You hit the nail on the head with this. My church has a very active young adult ministry. They host lots of activities and get togethers that center around a regular Tuesday Night Bible Study. Before I stopped going, it was nothing to have an average of 200 folks in Bible Study every week.
However, I was not happy there. I think I'm just an "old soul." I originally started going because I wanted to meet more people my own age. I've always had a habit of hanging around a more senior crowd. Unfortunately, I just don't fit with a younger crowd.
All of their activities tended to start late or at the very least run late which is not conducive to my waking up at 4:30 every morning and would totally throw off my schedule. The worst were always the poetry nights and Midnight Musical. Both were very work intensive. In the case of the former, it didn't help matters that I would rather gouge my eyes out with a dull, rusty spoon than have anything to do with poetry.
Then there's my waitressing skills that are legendary in how horrendous they are. I have a really short memory so it's a toss up whether or not I'll remember what's on the menu much less what the person ordered. Oh and did that table pay? Heck if I know. Needless to say, those nights were horrible for me and since I was on staff, I couldn't really blow them off. Follow all this up by having to be at church the next morning for the 8a service because I have swim practice in the afternoon did not make me a very happy camper.
The Midnight Musicals was even worse. Those days would start with the 8a church service, followed by swim practice, then a race back to the church by the call time of 6p for a service that wasn't starting until 10p. Assuming they ran on time. My first experience with the musical actually had them running a little over two hours behind. We didn't get out of there until 3:28 the following morning.
Resigning from the staff was a huge relief for me.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/25/2010 5:00:30 PM
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TheAimes
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This may have already been covered( i didn't have the time to go through and read all the posts). My theory is young adults come and feel out of place. I look around the church i attend and see most of the folks there are over 40, if any are younger than that they are married and starting families. I am fortunate that my church also has a Bible College which brings in students each semester but if they weren't there i would be one of few people there under 30. I am 22 and love my church but i feel out of place usually. I think to get more young adults active in church we have to make them feel "ok" to come. When new 20 somethings walk in the older folks are quick to judge because they aren't dressed "the way they are supposed to be". I know how others feel, i get those looks myself on the sundays i choose to wear jeans.. ugh its awful.
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Oh Christ, be the center of our lives, be the place we fix our eyes.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 2/25/2010 8:37:06 PM
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iluvatar
Posts: 3529
Joined: 4/12/2005
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Elena1030
Do y'all have age-graded Sunday School/Bible study? Or does everyone (all ages) do Bible study together?
During the 9am service, we have sunday school for 13yo and under. There is child care for some various events, but other than that, everybody's lumped together.
Our church is something of an oddity: we really are mostly college & grad students and young professionals. The majority of the small number of kids are infants, no teens that I can think of (?maybe one 12 yo?), a handful of seniors, and another handful of middle agers.
One thing that's really nice is that we have about a dozen different weeknight Bible Studies. Rather than having one big midweek service at the church, we have small ones at homes that all cover the same material, but meet on different nights of the week in different places around the city. We live and work in the burbs and trying to make it into Cambridge by 7pm on a weeknight requires some ...ambitious... driving, so it's nice having a couple other options that are closer to home.
I'll be brutally honest: a lot of it has to do with the sorts of people already at the church. A lot of church people are boring and/or aren't motivated to think or read or do anything for themselves. Who wants to show up to a bible study where some guy reads from a lesson plan and nobody else contributes? ZZZZZzzzzzzzz I'd rather gouge my eyes out than go to a Bible study at my parents' church, but the ones at my church are great.
-Dan.
_____________________________
Well, I've been to one world fair, a picnic, and a rodeo, and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard come over a set of earphones.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/2/2010 3:32:26 PM
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Elena1030
Posts: 2977
Joined: 6/21/2006
From: Music City, USA
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quote:
ORIGINAL: iluvatar
quote:
ORIGINAL: Elena1030
Do y'all have age-graded Sunday School/Bible study? Or does everyone (all ages) do Bible study together?
During the 9am service, we have sunday school for 13yo and under. There is child care for some various events, but other than that, everybody's lumped together.
Our church is something of an oddity: we really are mostly college & grad students and young professionals. The majority of the small number of kids are infants, no teens that I can think of (?maybe one 12 yo?), a handful of seniors, and another handful of middle agers.
One thing that's really nice is that we have about a dozen different weeknight Bible Studies. Rather than having one big midweek service at the church, we have small ones at homes that all cover the same material, but meet on different nights of the week in different places around the city. We live and work in the burbs and trying to make it into Cambridge by 7pm on a weeknight requires some ...ambitious... driving, so it's nice having a couple other options that are closer to home.
I'll be brutally honest: a lot of it has to do with the sorts of people already at the church. A lot of church people are boring and/or aren't motivated to think or read or do anything for themselves. Who wants to show up to a bible study where some guy reads from a lesson plan and nobody else contributes? ZZZZZzzzzzzzz I'd rather gouge my eyes out than go to a Bible study at my parents' church, but the ones at my church are great.
-Dan.
Ah, so y'all do what is termed "small-group ministry" -- also known as community groups, cell groups, home groups, life groups. We've got quite a lot of churches in middle TN that use that structure.
There are more churches like yours than you might imagine -- esp. in major metro areas with lots of colleges, good school systems, and plenty of job opps. You'll get lots of college students, young professionals, young families, as well as median adults who really get into contemporary/blended styles of worship and "nontraditional" church structures.
Cambridge -- Mass. or England?
_____________________________
"I like to stride, not mince." -- Maggie
Prayer thread for singles who desire to marry someday
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/2/2010 4:24:38 PM
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RedRabbit
Posts: 162
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quote:
ORIGINAL: vv56964
Our church has many active groups and committees, including Bible Studies, but we get very little involvement from individuals/couples ages 25-40. As someone in this age group that would love to get to know others with my experiences, this is quite frustrating.
What do you do as a church to get this age involved and connected?
Thousands turn out in that age group to this conference which is pretty much aimed at them. You might want to take a look at what if offers [NEXT one is coming up soon] currently and since its inception. Maybe it will give you some clues where their heads are at and what draws them to the conference year after year.
See: http://www.thisisnext.org/
~EA
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/2/2010 5:31:44 PM
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RedRabbit
Posts: 162
Joined: 2/20/2010
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quote:
ORIGINAL: doinkdom
Events and programs will draw younger folks in, but what's going to make them stick around?
If our churches become event or program driven, then how does a young person become a fully functional follower of Christ within a local body of believers? I'm not convinced that programs or events are what younger people need...I think encouraging them to serve alongside everyone else, to be introduced to gospel-centered living and learning how to apply scripture to their lives is something that would be of better benefit.
Wow AMEN to that. Yes!! I totally agree that leadership should focus on helping folks to be a "fully functional follower of Christ" - it's called "raising up disciples". "Sevring along side everyone else" yes again. Well said. - EA
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/4/2010 10:33:37 PM
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Trishcreations
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We have a lot of young adults in our church...we have them help run the youth progam, they are involved in a leadership class that helps them grow spiritually as well as giving them the tools to move forward in their careers or ministries. Some of the young adults we have, have gone on to giving short messages on youth night.
We have them over to our homes, and plan fun events for them. We also have a team of young people that have not been able to find jobs, and we have provided paid employment for them. Our young adults are in church 3 days a week and usually hang with us at least 1-2 additional days besides, and have their friends mostly from others in the church....nice support systen for them.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/5/2010 9:18:06 AM
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SteelCurtain
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From: Virginia
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I believe in order to reach every generation and meet their needs, we need to take a look at the church as a business. Hear me out before you string me up for bringing up such a comparison 
If you are going to draw "customers" into your business then there has to be something that will draw them. A good church has something for each age group. Typically, we do well with our children, youth, and even our senior citizens but we always seem to fail at this age group of young adults (it varies in age from church to church but let's just say 18-35). When students graduate the youth ministry then they are left with "where do I go now?" and end up hanging out as "older youth" until their early 20's and then they fall away from the faith. Barna research stated that 85% of students who accepted Christ, fell away from the faith during their college years. That's HUGE!!
So, first and foremost, there has to be a designed game plan on how to keep and attract other young adults:
1. Very simple. Someone needs to step up within the local church body and form a young adult group within the church. You can't attract people to a place that does not exist.
2. The Pastor of the church needs to champion this ministry and recognize it from the pulpit, "Hey our YA's are having their Bible study this week, come out and join them."
3. Activities are great and are needed within the church. However, having them and doing nothing in terms of relationship building will eventually leave you with a program driven ministry with no fruit because people will leave. We are born to have relationships.
4. Finally, what we do with our YA group is we meet each Thursday night. One week we will do a Bible study, the next week will be an activity and then once a month we do a weekend activity or ministry together.
Bottom line is NOT to make all of this harder than what it is.
_____________________________
Pray simply, wait sometimes, stick to the path.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/5/2010 10:05:41 AM
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ppodmama
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Is it possible that they are raising children and trying to balance Godly priorities of God-Spouse-Children-work/service? I realize there is absolutely no way for ministry leaders to know how much and in what ways the congregation is serving the Lord in their daily lives, but maybe it's possible that most are already honoring God with their service in ways that aren't "official".
If you are working a full time job that takes 45-60 hours per week-if you commute
If you are married, not only do you need to dedicate devoted time for your spouse, but there is the day to day responsibilities to do
If you have children, there is there education and dedicated devoted time to be a parent and model a Christian life and marriage
If you have extended family who may be elderly, you have to take care of your caregiving responsibilities
If you own a home, you have civic responsibilites like home maintenance
If you are not wealthy enough to hire out for service issues on your home, it falls to you to have to do those things alone.
I'm not saying they should NEVER do anything for church, but just because a miistry is organized and no one is participating, doesn't mean no one is serving God and honoring His Priorities.
Rev. Andy Stanley...great book
http://www.amazon.com/Choosing-Cheat-Wins-Family-Collide/dp/B002PJ4MMQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1267801510&sr=8-1
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/5/2010 11:36:35 AM
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SteelCurtain
Posts: 152
Joined: 3/20/2007
From: Virginia
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quote:
ORIGINAL: ppodmama
Is it possible that they are raising children and trying to balance Godly priorities of God-Spouse-Children-work/service? I realize there is absolutely no way for ministry leaders to know how much and in what ways the congregation is serving the Lord in their daily lives, but maybe it's possible that most are already honoring God with their service in ways that aren't "official".
If you are working a full time job that takes 45-60 hours per week-if you commute
If you are married, not only do you need to dedicate devoted time for your spouse, but there is the day to day responsibilities to do
If you have children, there is there education and dedicated devoted time to be a parent and model a Christian life and marriage
If you have extended family who may be elderly, you have to take care of your caregiving responsibilities
If you own a home, you have civic responsibilites like home maintenance
If you are not wealthy enough to hire out for service issues on your home, it falls to you to have to do those things alone.
I'm not saying they should NEVER do anything for church, but just because a miistry is organized and no one is participating, doesn't mean no one is serving God and honoring His Priorities.
Rev. Andy Stanley...great book
http://www.amazon.com/Choosing-Cheat-Wins-Family-Collide/dp/B002PJ4MMQ/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1267801510&sr=8-1
Absolutely a valid point. However, the last two points about taking care of your home is a bit of a stretch
_____________________________
Pray simply, wait sometimes, stick to the path.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/5/2010 12:28:22 PM
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ppodmama
Posts: 745
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From: Midwest
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quote:
However, the last two points about taking care of your home is a bit of a stretch
I used to think that too, until one time we decided to keep track of where our time was going and we got a whole new perspective...there is only 168 hours in one week.
Two counterpoints to that...
1. Depending on the community you live in, there are ordiances or EVERYTHING including how often and within how many hours you have to remove snow after a snow fall, the length of your lawn (yep!) Exterior home appearance.
2. Lets break down the list 168
A. 45-60 hours for work (depending on and if salary positiocommute) = 108
B. 30-60 min per day devotion time = 101
C. 1 hour per day p/up dropoff kids =96
D. sleep 56 hour (7 days/8 hours)=40
E. meal prep & eat meals=(1.5 hours perday)29.5
F. Get KIDS ready and self showered and ready
(1 hour per day) =22.5
G. Get Ready for Bedtime and child devotion (.5 per day)=18.5
I. Bringing meal to parents, making sure they took meds=11.5
H. Laundry (.15 per day)=9.5
J. Errand running for groceries , fueling up vehicle, pickin up meds or needed supplies or school (2-3 hours per week) = 6.5
with only 6.5 hours, an unexpected trip to the doctor, a snowfall, a home or vehicle repair, etc..... and you can see where it can be
A. Hard to make a committment, when you want your yes to be yes.
B. This is without any devoted time as a husband/wife, parent/child (oh yeah, forgot about helping with homework!)
That is what has lead us to be 24 hour a day Christians...always serving God in everything we are doing, rather than getting involved in something real organized. We want to share and serve Christ wherever we are whenever we are.
This is where burnout and family problems can easily find their way in.
And what about the day of rest?
< Message edited by ppodmama -- 3/5/2010 12:59:49 PM >
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/7/2010 12:58:06 PM
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stellaluna
Posts: 4249
Joined: 4/11/2005
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I'm 39, married, no kids. I'm not currently attending a church because we've moved, but my former church had zero activities/classes/seminars/studies for my age group that didn't involve raising your family.
The men's groups all focused on camping and fishing, which my husband wasn't into. The women's groups were repeated Beth Moore studies, which I wasn't into. We tried to volunteer with the kids and teens, but they wanted people who are parents. We tried to volunteer with the college group and they didn't need any help. I ended up volunteering on the media team and got completely burned out because there wasn't enough help and I ended up devoting 12 hours of my Saturdays and Sundays to that.
We pretty much decided to go to weekly services and then wait to do anything else until we are old enough for the retired people groups, but I admit I was glad to move.
At this point I'm pretty much against anything that divides according to age or life situation, but I think there aren't enough things going on that are topical. I would be willing to add into my week a bible study that was concentrated on a topic and related activities. I don't know why it would need to be for one age group or gender.
< Message edited by stellaluna -- 3/7/2010 1:05:07 PM >
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/7/2010 4:23:54 PM
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RJR_fan
Posts: 801
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From: RTP, in sunny NC USA
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quote:
We pretty much decided to go to weekly services and then wait to do anything else until we are old enough for the retired people groups
God has brought a mission field to our doorstep, thousands upon thousands of bright young people from around the world, the future leaders of their nations. Open your hearts and homes to these kids, and you'll make friends for life. AND evangelize "closed" nations.
The world if FULL of nice things to do for Jesus -- and most of them DON'T happen under a steeple!
_____________________________
Blogging my way through the Turkish New Testament
Meet my beloved mentor, RJR
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/7/2010 6:46:46 PM
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stellaluna
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I was actually referring to church activities specifically.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/8/2010 6:43:36 AM
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RJR_fan
Posts: 801
Joined: 4/12/2005
From: RTP, in sunny NC USA
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quote:
ORIGINAL: stellaluna
I was actually referring to church activities specifically.
God's Kingdom includes the church, and its activities. but it is SO much bigger than the church! The King's reign is comprehensive, and touches every area of life. We are designed for fulfillment, for the joy of hearing the Master's "Well done, good and faithful servant." But if our vision is too small, we'll miss out on the opportunities God has provided us. Herman Hesse's masterful study on power and leadership, The Glass Bead Game, portrays a society so focused on one tiny set of activities -- mastery of an esoteric game -- that they lose sight of the world around them.
_____________________________
Blogging my way through the Turkish New Testament
Meet my beloved mentor, RJR
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/8/2010 7:03:39 AM
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luispinzon
Posts: 28
Joined: 2/26/2010
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The same usual activities are good for this brothers and sisters, anyway we can make a special dinner or event in order to share our lives. God bless you all.
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RE: Getting young adults to participate - 3/9/2010 12:47:14 AM
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lakehills101
Posts: 10
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It seems like the older Christians grow, the more they forget what it's like to be young. We do need to have all age groups together at times, AND it's great to have age specific activities for those who like them. For many younger people, much of life is about activity. Our young adults have chosen their own things: helping out at food pantries, serving in camps, as well as fun activities, too. Why do we have to have either/or? Doing life together with twenty-somethings covers a wider variety than just a single program. It's about real life relationships and caring, accepting environments. At least it's working like that for us.
I like your input about dinners or events in order to share our lives, luispinzon!
_____________________________
~ Mike Knapp
http://www.lakehillsfmc.com
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No matter what I did, they continued to look at me as a child and it wasn't until my husband and I divorced and I went to a different church where I felt like I was being treated like an actual adult. 
Let freedom ring...let the whole world sing...it's independence day!!!! 
Does your church do the all-ages/family structure? (
